I love music, I’ve been a life long musician, I have a degree in music history, and I worked for the largest record company in America for years, and I still play music every day. I know music.

But I watch the Grammys, and I have no idea who many of these people are, and when I hear their music, I wonder how they got to that level with such bland, boring music. Even the ones I recognize are awful. Sabrina Carpenter is cute as a button, and jumps around in her underwear a lot, which is a plus, because her music is unlistenable in an elevator/grocery store background music kind of way.

Where does anyone even hear this stuff? Why do they like it?

No wonder classic rock is getting so popular. It might be vintage, but it’s still great music, and if you’ve never heard it before, it might as well be brand new.