Honestly my mom is so weird:

Like, when I was a kid, she’ll cuddle with me, encourage me to sleep in their bed, and like show affection, and she had moments when she was so wholesome and lovely. She frequently tells me how much she loves me, how smart she supposely thought of me.

But also, often times like… she can easily flip and like yell at me for small mistakes and scold me and belittle me… and I’d cry…

My brain is so fucking confused… lol… what the fuck was that?

Why was I shown love, then she flips on a different mask and becomes a different person like an hour later?

Bipolar?

Idk I have a truma bond to her, so confusing.

As for dad… idk he is just like chilling and doesn’t really show either affection much but neither yells much either… like apathetic…

But anyways, if I ever have children, I’ll do the affection thing, but I’ll make sure I control my emotions and never show anger directed towards my children. I will never make my children feel scared like the way I felt when mom always did to me. Never again.