Water usage is probably my biggest. Living in a high desert, my wife and MIL see no problem with filling one side of the sink with hot soapy water to wash a few dishes because “that’s just how I’ve always done it”, to watering the grass and plants for hours. All of this makes me mental.

    • leavenotrace@feddit.nu
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      2 hours ago

      When you thank a cashier, that’s the standard polite way to close the interaction and both of you understand you’re not actually expressing gratitude to them for simply doing their job.

      Responding with “you’re welcome” implies the settlement of a social debt (i.e., yes, I did you a favor and your gratitude is acknowledged) that wasn’t part of that purely transactional exchange. It’s an exaggerated response that comes across as presumptuous. You thanking the cashier doesn’t indebt them, but their “you’re welcome” implies that you owed them.

      BUT that’s not their intent, they’re just mindlessly saying it because that’s how their manager or grandma or someone taught them to respond and they never stopped to think about it. So I find it mildly annoying, but I’d never point it out and neither of us wants that discussion.

      • tomenzgg@midwest.social
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        1 hour ago

        I mean, I’d argue that “Thank you” always implies acknowledging a social debt; if you don’t feel there was a social debt someone just assisted you with, I probably wouldn’t say, “Thank you.”

        “Have a good day” would just as equally and politely close the interaction while not implying you were just assisted with a social debt.

      • HatchetHaro@pawb.social
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        1 hour ago

        that is a very weird way of looking at it. “thank you” has always been a way of expressing gratitude.

        yes, they may simply just be doing their job, but at the same time you are also doing what you as a customer should be doing: place your items on the counter, pay, get your stuff, and leave. there’s no need for you to thank someone; there’s no need for any words of exchange.

        “thank you” may be a standard polite phrase, but so is “you’re welcome” or “no problem”. you were polite to them, so let them be polite to you by acknowledging your expression of gratitude.