Don’t give me ‘get off of social media’. I want practical tips that can be used when talking to random people in public places.

  • zzffyfajzkzhnsweqm@sh.itjust.works
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    2 hours ago

    Learn how to be honestly invested into people you talk with:

    • ask them meaningful questions about them.
    • aks them open-ended questions.
    • ask them sub-questions.
    • find a topic they are really interested and sparks a joy in their eyes. And go deeper. Try to learn.
    • ask why question. “Why do you like this the most?”

    For kids I usually go with what is your favorite school subject? Why? What is the best part? Why?.. For grownups ask about their hobbies. Why do they like them? What is the best part?

    This is the single most important advice. This is about them not you. And it forms deeper connections.

    Extra: Simple smile can really make a strangers day.

    • Sergio@piefed.social
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      5 hours ago

      ask them meaningful questions about them.

      This is absolutely right. To add to this, find a level at which they’re comfortable talking about themselves (i.e. don’t get TOO personal right off the start). It’ Ok to start off on some trivial small-talk, then moving up to their opinion about something, then more in-depth about why they have that opinion. Keep an eye on whether they’re starting to feel uncomfortable and back off if needed.

      I had a friend who was excellent at this. I’m a loner by nature but I learned a lot by watching them just talking to people. They weren’t talking to them to get anything, they just enjoyed talking to people. That’s a great attitude to have.

    • alternategait@lemmy.world
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      10 hours ago

      This is some really good advice. People can learn more about some of these ideas by searching for conversational threading.