I didn’t mean to argue or be rude or ungrateful to your intentions, but is it not greedy and selfish to expect someone to stay alive for your pleasure? Obviously we’re Internet strangers, we probably won’t talk again outside of this thread, but even when family or acquaintances (not sure I have any real friends anymore) tell me that, it feels like they only say that because it’s what society expects them to say. They aren’t there for me when I’m in need or feel helpless, they can’t change the fact that every waking moment I feel miserable and worthless, so to me it just seems like they’re being selfish to say I need to stick around for them. If I was important enough to need to be alive, why don’t any of them ever reach out to me or check in on me or ask to hang out or anything? They only come out of the woodwork when I’m ready to end it all to chime in with paper thin commentary like this.
You have a mental health issue that no one on here can solve.
I say this because I spent years in the same place, on the edge of ending my own life. I had a pact with myself that I wouldn’t let myself live another 10 years. That was 12 years ago.
You are depressed. But you can make progress. All of the things that everyone says are the ways out of depression do work - they just don’t work overnight, and they don’t all work all the time - sometimes it’s medication, sometimes it’s quitting booze, sometimes it’s sleeping 8 hours. Sometimes it’s none for a little while and things are bad. It’s a process. But eventually you make progress.
Medication, learning to look after myself better, and finding things in life I do enjoy, have really helped my depression. It’s still a struggle and I’m still improving.
I’ve had a really hard week, it’s Sunday today and I laid on the couch reading a novel for about 8 hours (with breaks). I feel a lot better today than I did yesterday.
It’s a two-way street. They can’t be the only ones to make contact. You have to make an effort as well. Maybe you have.
If they tell you they care, I believe that’s the truth. But it’s exhausting being the only one to maintain a relationship. Trust me as someone who loves my friends and family but I am suffering the consequences of not having the energy to make almost any contact, and thus losing a lot of my relationships. I’d love to be closer with my brothers but it’s too much in life right now and forever to make the calls. They used to call me, now they don’t, because I never reciprocated. Even though we love to hang out when visiting each other’s cities.
I don’t know your situation at all, but I’m telling you that I want you to live, not for my sake or my selfish reasons (I obviously don’t know you and have zero attachments), but because I want you to feel important, because living should make you feel that way. I want this for you simply because I have empathy and sympathy. That’s it. Same as your circle of friends and family probably as well.
I want you to live. ❤️
I didn’t mean to argue or be rude or ungrateful to your intentions, but is it not greedy and selfish to expect someone to stay alive for your pleasure? Obviously we’re Internet strangers, we probably won’t talk again outside of this thread, but even when family or acquaintances (not sure I have any real friends anymore) tell me that, it feels like they only say that because it’s what society expects them to say. They aren’t there for me when I’m in need or feel helpless, they can’t change the fact that every waking moment I feel miserable and worthless, so to me it just seems like they’re being selfish to say I need to stick around for them. If I was important enough to need to be alive, why don’t any of them ever reach out to me or check in on me or ask to hang out or anything? They only come out of the woodwork when I’m ready to end it all to chime in with paper thin commentary like this.
😕
You have a mental health issue that no one on here can solve.
I say this because I spent years in the same place, on the edge of ending my own life. I had a pact with myself that I wouldn’t let myself live another 10 years. That was 12 years ago.
You are depressed. But you can make progress. All of the things that everyone says are the ways out of depression do work - they just don’t work overnight, and they don’t all work all the time - sometimes it’s medication, sometimes it’s quitting booze, sometimes it’s sleeping 8 hours. Sometimes it’s none for a little while and things are bad. It’s a process. But eventually you make progress.
Wishing the best for you.
Medication, learning to look after myself better, and finding things in life I do enjoy, have really helped my depression. It’s still a struggle and I’m still improving.
I’ve had a really hard week, it’s Sunday today and I laid on the couch reading a novel for about 8 hours (with breaks). I feel a lot better today than I did yesterday.
your comment is a breath of fresh air.
Do you want to hang out with them?
It’s a two-way street. They can’t be the only ones to make contact. You have to make an effort as well. Maybe you have.
If they tell you they care, I believe that’s the truth. But it’s exhausting being the only one to maintain a relationship. Trust me as someone who loves my friends and family but I am suffering the consequences of not having the energy to make almost any contact, and thus losing a lot of my relationships. I’d love to be closer with my brothers but it’s too much in life right now and forever to make the calls. They used to call me, now they don’t, because I never reciprocated. Even though we love to hang out when visiting each other’s cities.
I don’t know your situation at all, but I’m telling you that I want you to live, not for my sake or my selfish reasons (I obviously don’t know you and have zero attachments), but because I want you to feel important, because living should make you feel that way. I want this for you simply because I have empathy and sympathy. That’s it. Same as your circle of friends and family probably as well.
I want you to live, love, and find happiness. 🙂