My 2 year old goldendoodle just yeeted herself off the porch for no reason and fucked up her leg. Of course the vet is booked until 11 AM tomorrow. This is the same dog that had to get bowel obstruction surgery twice in two months because she kept eating toys. She is not allowed to have toys anymore.

She’s such a goblin.

  • Ageroth@reddthat.com
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    12 hours ago

    We have a cat that is like 95% goblin. Laziest fucking cat I’ve ever seen, literally sleeps all day and night except for when it’s food time, usually in the warmest part of the house. The only thing he really cares about is getting fed. He will come find you when it’s dinner time and make sure you didn’t forget.
    We’ve had to 'goblin proof’s the house by adding magnets to the cupboard door so he can’t just open it himself and have learned to never leave any of our food out on the counters. I can’t count how many times we would get a loaf of bread or package of tortillas or stuff like that and leave it out on the counter just to find it on the floor the next morning with big chunks bitten out of them, or find the butter dish with the cover knocked off and a big divot where he licked like a tablespoons worth of butter. I had to start putting the jar of bacon grease in the fridge as soon as I had poured it out of the pan because otherwise he would get to it while we were eating and just dip his paw into it to lick at the delicious. More than once we have brought in the shipment of dog food but didn’t think to fully put it away and then later found him shoulder deep in the food having chewed through the cardboard box and the plastic bag to get to the dog food inside.
    So yeah, all that to preface, this cat had to get an emergency exploratory gastro surgery to remove a black silicone rubber cock ring he chewed into pieces and ate but couldn’t pass. Little fucker still tries his hardest to eat any silicone rubber he can get to, and he knows the drawer I keep them in and has figured out how to open it, so we don’t have many silicone toys anymore.