Literally I would not be caught dead drinking from that thing

Wank hand forever

and when you had one as a teen you still couldn’t afford to text for hours on end

And neither could my parents as it turned out

I’ve had the exact same experience.

I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that. But before I tell you why I’d like to take a moment to talk about today’s sponsor HelloFresh.

I do the same but with real nature audioscape tracks people put on youtube. Creeks and blackbirds especially.

Not if it’s 2D

Melinda’s sauces are fantastic. Generally speaking I mostly ditched vinegar bases for fruity sauces, spicy ketchup and chutneys. Oh and a completely different one that I can highly recommend is this one:

It’s ok but iirc they use capsaicin concentrate which just adds artificial heat without flavor. These days I avoid that stuff. The best hot sauces I’ve had were all made from Moruga Scorpion peppers. They pack a lot of heat but it doesn’t hit you as harshly as with other strains. Goes especially well with fruity or smokey spices. My favorite chili pepper by a long shot.

Reminds me of this hot sauce. The actual sensation comes surprisingly close to the image.

Literally Jorjor Well

I have in fact lived through a few near-castration experiences with the crank of my bench vice.

I tend to fall asleep out of nowhere. Sometimes it looks like I got shot. Sometimes my legs are crossed or my hands are folded behind my head. Sometimes I fall asleep on the floor while playing with the cat.

Always sleeping with one brown eye open

It depends. Jesus is certainly as important as Mohammed to Muslims and it’s not prohibited to celebrate his birth but some would never participate simply because it’s a Christian tradition. Also the ban of images makes all the customs around Christmas a little tricky. In Turkey for example a lot of Muslims do celebrate but you won’t find nativity scenes or stuff like that there, only images of Noel Baba (“Christmas Dad” = Santa) who is modeled after Saint Nicholas but himself not a religious figure.

Shrimp balmed lip

The violin part kinda checks out tbh. It’s like saying a saxophone is basically a shiny clarinet. It’s musician ragebait but it’s not entirely false.

First of all it’s your hobby and you can do whatever you want forever. That being said if you want to improve your skills you won’t get there by relying on shortcuts. Drawing is 10% talent and 90% practice as are many creative skills. There are great tutorials out there to teach you about proportions, perspective, lighting and so on. And the most important thing is persistence. Draw everything you want to and try not to care too much about the outcome. If you stay at it then sooner or later you will be able to draw all sorts of things just like you imagined them without even thinking about it.

Fuck zodiac signs, what type of garlic are you?