You don’t even know the half of it.

My friend convinced a 45 yr old pharmacist to divorce her husband and leave her family. He dumped her right after.

Ikr? How is wine measured in slabs…

Bohemian rhapsody - it’s one of the greatest songs ever made, just curious to see how it would retard the progression of music.

Huh thought he only did rock

I stopped buying consoles after they wanted to charge me to use the internet. That’s not how this works.

Ninja scroll. Did you know cartoons can get raped??? I didn’t…

Phone. Like why? He have the letter F…

I didn’t wanna be fat in university so I started BJJ. Then I didn’t wanna be weak in BJJ so I started lifting weights. Then I wanted to make weight so I started eating better.

Kind of a slippery slope to health 🤷‍♂️.

All im hearing is management.

I like everything except that last part. DO MAINTENANCE ON YOUR RELATIONSHIPS PEOPLE. Not enough people maintain relationships

They don’t know we’re in the 4th iteration of English.

I always imagined her as a mechanic

No but it does mutate at a lighting rate. That’s why we can cure it. Something about protein strands constantly evolving.

AIDS didn’t get the memo, try emailing them.

Huh I never thought about it like that.

He’ll save every one of us

“Cause I’m having a good time, I’m having a ball”

All of those have hidden homosexual messages.

What fresh he’ll is this…