I have either written or gotten a variant of every single one of these comments 🫠:

Please include the JIRA task in the commit title.

Did you run any manual testing?

Where’s the PRD link in the commit message?

Can you please split this into multiple smaller commits?

Can you combine these two commits?

Did you email Jon about this because he’s working on that project with Sarah and you might be duplicating efforts.

This should be named BarFoo instead of FooBar.

Why aren’t you using CorporateInternalLib16 that does 90% of this?

Why aren’t you using ThirdPartyPaidLibByExEmployee?

Why aren’t you using StandardLib thing you forgot existed?

All our I/O should be async.

All our hot loop code needs to be sync.

This will increase latency of NonCoreBusinessFlow by 0.01%. can you shave some time off so we can push in feature B also?

Please add a feature flag so we can do gradual rollout.

What operational levers does this have?

Lgtm - just address those comments

All images are stacked bar charts if you try hard enough

Holy propaganda batman!

The list of articles on that website is…extremely focused on one subject only.

Locks are only held during system calls. Process termination is handled on the system call boundary.

You’re projecting windows kernel insanity where it doesn’t belong.

What the duck Microsoft bullshit is this?

There is no concept of locked files in extfs, much less inside the kernel. Resource locks and unkillable processes is some windows bullshit that no sane operating system would touch with a ten foot pole.

Does that mean the engagement band is just a semiring?

Lemmy doesn’t have karma farming because it doesn’t have karma.

Accounts earn their reputation based on name recognition, not some artificial score.

Obligatory xckd what if

The correct term is “Computational Statistics”

So to be clear: you didn’t laugh?

Nope. Bitkeeper used it in the master-slave pairing and the term was carried forward. Gitlab did a whole writeup about it.

.gitattributes can invoke Word on windows to diff versions, and there are plenty of open source scripts that can do it if you don’t have a copy of Word (or Windows) lying around.

But Word is like shit for papers. Use LaTeX instead.

Older C compilers would truncate a variable name if it was too long, so VeryLongGlobalConstantInsideALibraryInSeconds might accidentally collide with VeryLongGlobalConstantInsideALibraryInMinutes.

Legend says that they used to do it after a single letter with Dennis declaring “26 variables ought to be enough for anyone”.

Red circles are deprecated in favor of teal because of accessibility requirement WIP.DOnotUSE.14.g.2025.v0.

They started from XML. There’s nowhere to go but up but spring managed to fuck even that up.

FactoryStrategyFactoryFactoryObserverInterface

Friends don’t let friends use Java 😜

Whoosh

Seriously though, spring configurations are written in XML and you create variables, call functions, and have control flow. Effectively turning XML into a horrible twisted shadow of a programming language.

All in the name of “configurability” through dependency injection.

XML is the second worst programming language ever created by humans

Centrifuges spin really fast, so you need to balance out the things they’re spinning, otherwise it can fall catastrophically.

Stick everything on one side and it will effectively explode.

Don’t make the mistake of anthropomorphizing Larry Ellison

$previous_job allowed us to pick. One of my coworkers had to replace his laptop, and I convinced him to try out Linux this time. I handed him the bootstrap script and he was back to working by the afternoon.

Our CEO got wind of this and said as a matter of policy everyone is switching to Linux unless they have a good reason (needing excel for financial reports is a good reason). The two new hires who had been setting up their dev environment for over a week at that point were the trigger for this.