• Wren@lemmy.today
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    12 hours ago

    I thought everyone was sexually attracted to all genders at least a little bit until I learned that no, straight people are actually straight.

  • thezeesystem@piefed.blahaj.zone
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    21 hours ago

    25 when my therapist at the time helped me realize what LGBT actually fucking was and not what the media betrayal of it is.

    Basically when someone told me what It actually is instead of a “disease” or “disorder”

  • LettyWhiterock@lemmy.world
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    21 hours ago

    I was 17 I realized I was trans. A revelation that helped me better understand my sexuality as well. Turns out I’m bi/pan. I did spend several years just assuming I was ace because the idea of sex didn’t interest me until I realized I was a woman.

  • Mora@pawb.social
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    23 hours ago

    11 and the revelation was delivered by a wet dream. I mean I looked at dicks online before “to compare” but did not realize I was attracted to it. After realizing that it just took about 5 years to start sharing that with my closest friends and another 8 years to share with my family and other friends. Started dating with 26 and have been in a happy relationship ever since (though I would love more fuck buddies, as I am still rather inexperienced there).

  • Tonava@sopuli.xyz
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    21 hours ago

    I was a teen when I found the word asexual and knew what was “wrong” with me. I had known way before though, I just didn’t have a word for it. On the other hand I was over twenty when I finally figured I was trans too. In hindsight the signs were already there when I was six years old or so, it just wasn’t a thing people understood back then

  • weariedfae@sh.itjust.works
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    22 hours ago

    I should have realized it when I was experimenting with friends but I had my first real inkling at 13. Tried opening up to someone who said “ew” which scared me into full denial for a good long time.

  • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Around 15-16. I used to browse 4chan during it’s heavy trap phase and realized I don’t mind if they have a penis as long as they look like a girl

  • TheHotze@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    I was 26 when I realized that romantic attraction is even a thing. It was a year later before I realized that I am ace as well as aro.

  • AnarchoEngineer@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 days ago

    I discovered I was good at flirting at 17. I also discovered that as soon as a girl starts making out with me or getting handsy I lose interest. My brain is like “yay, validation, we won, okay let’s go get a snack.”

    Took me over a year to learn that asexuality is a spectrum and that there are other people who like sex in theory but can be repulsed by (or indifferent to) it in practice.

    • Imaginary_Stand4909@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      6 hours ago

      Did you ever have a “maybe I’m bi” phase?

      I’m asking because an Asexual youtuber stated they thought they had an equal attraction to men and women, before realizing that they did like the equally… at 0 attraction.

      I know this sounds crazy, but i did kiss and makeout my same-sex female friends at a sleepover when we were 8-9 years old because we wanted to “practice” (y’all, don’t let kids have unrestricted/unmonitored internet 😭), but I never thought of them in a girlfriend/date way. I thought I liked a close girl friend in middle school, but once I got to high school I realized I’ve never had butterflies, wet dreams, or any desire to kiss any boys or girls that I met.

      At this point, I think I’m asexual (or maybe demi). I know that graysexuals can still have some sexual attraction or like having sex, so I don’t feel any doubt/imposter syndrome for reading smut (hey, some aces write smut).

      Anyway to add to the overall thread I’ve been questioning since 10 or so, and going with Ace since 16 or so.

      • AnarchoEngineer@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        5 hours ago

        After kissing a girl for a first time, realizing I wasn’t into it, my first thought was “oh fuck what if I’ve been gay this whole time?” That night I looked up gay porn 😂 I was very much grossed out and definitely didn’t feel the arousal I would from women.

        I did eventually kiss a guy at college because I’m a scientist lol and yeah despite him being a good looking dude, honestly not a fan. Sadly I think I’m just sex repulsed by men

        Anyway I’m also aromantic. All my guy friends and girl friends would obsess over crushes and think about lives together or being in a relationship and I didn’t get any of that. Like why should I care who a person sees apart from me?

        (Also, me, I am an ace who writes smut lololol at least I did in highschool)

    • Jhuskindle@lemmy.world
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      11 hours ago

      Ayyyye similar! Ive always been a bit flirty but just have no interest in sex. I didn’t admit I was ace until 36 or so. I tried many ways I just don’t care lol

      • AnarchoEngineer@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        5 hours ago

        I haven’t tried too many times, but I’ve discovered it’s kind of just interesting to see how different people like different things.

        And hey it is nice to meet another similar ace. Most aces I meet online or otherwise are completely sex repulsed. Then again I suppose I haven’t met many aces online or in person lol

  • siv9939@lemmy.zip
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    2 days ago

    37- My spouse realized they were nonbinary, which made me do some self examination and realize I wasn’t as cis as I thought I was.