The moment I agreed to take my ex back. She’d given me an ultimatum, and I took my friend’s mom’s advice that the answer to any ultimatum should default to no. But more than that it was a demand for me to live a very different life than the one I’d realized I wanted. She wasn’t happy with that, and to be honest with myself I wasn’t happy with her, I’d needed her for shelter. She wanted me to be normal and acceptable, and I wanted a life full of passion, excitement, and freedom.

We stayed together for a month after that. I’d agreed to get relationship counseling, but I only wanted it to help break up because I learned I don’t have a spine and I did love her and want what’s best for her. We didn’t last that long. I still hope she’s well even though last I heard she understandably hates me, though barring the apology I’ll never get I have no desire to forgive her for how she treated me in the breakup or in her rising discontent that led to the ultimatum.

A few months later though I met my wife by living the life my ex wanted me to stop. She’d also been through a recent breakup along very similar lines.