Ok Lemmings look, I love life and I love my family, so I’d hate to have to blow my fucking brains out. So what’s another strategy for tuning out this incessant lava chicken?
Alternatively, does anyone have a time machine and enough money to convince Jack Black to not do the Minecraft movie?
You deafen yourself with a sharp pencil. Only way.
Oh my gosh, your comment made me sick.
I mean really, who in their right mind would even consider that? Personally I can’t even imagine just wasting a perfectly good pencil. Please be a responsible adult and use a fork instead (in case you can’t fit the fork into your ear canal you might wanna widen it with a spoon first. Btw. spoons are the goto in case your ability to see is bothering you too)
Who’s wasting it? Just wipe it off with a paper towel and you can use it on your crossword!
Why would you waste perfectly fine food by wiping it off with a towel? Kids in africa can surely still eat that!
Also just in case your crossword puzzle starts talking to you: no it didn’t (they’re not actually sentient, but can still feel pain of course). And please for the love of god, don’t ask it about it’s opinion on skin colors