• Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Have you ever seen a ducks penis? Just be glad whatever genitals you have isn’t a ducks penis. It’s so fucked up that they don’t even GET a bathroom. They just pee in the drinking water. They pee in lakes. Ponds. Your bathtub. They pee anywhere they want, any time they want.

    Thats why they all hang out at parks, and the government doesn’t stop them. Think about it man. You don’t see lions and tigers and bears at the park…because Disney owns the rights to The Wizard of Oz. So you can’t see those animals for free! They gotta get locked up in jail and then they call it a zoo, and charge you $22.50 per adult, and $12 per child under 12. Except on Mondays where it’s free if you’re a local resident of the county.

    But they don’t do that with ducks. You know what else Disney owns? The Mighty Ducks. Darkwing Duck.

    And NOBODY is paying money to see those properties. So they don’t arrest the ducks, because theres no profit there. Follow the money. It all leads back to those crazy duck penis’s, and nobody wants to admit that Howard the Duck is officially a Marvel character, living in the same MCU as Spiderman, and Ironman, and the X-Men.

    THATS why ducks don’t have bathrooms, while humans fight over things like trans athletes being allowed to play sports in college, and throwing green dildos at female basketball players to promote cryptocurrencies.

    We live in the dumbest timeline.

    • Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Except on Mondays where it’s free if you’re a local resident of the county.

      I read this and immediately knew who posted it.

      • WoodScientist@lemmy.world
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        8 hours ago

        I’m going to right now start the conspiracy theory that the actual US president, Donald Trump, has not worn pants or underwear in decades. He’s somehow just hypnotized us all into not noticing.