Removing a condom without consent during sex is sexual assault. You’re absolutely right to break off a relationship or go no-contact for this. In many jurisdictions, you could press criminal charges.
I even called an old coworker to ask if she had her citizenship because I was trying to avoid child support.
Your comment addressed everything I wanted to. You’re spot on.
He was definitely raped by her physically (condom removal) and mentally (sexually controlling, baby leverage).
He was wrong for asking about citizenship. That’s a fucked up level to go to for her actions, however vile. It’s pretty racist in my opinion because he wouldn’t ask that if she were White.
My verdict is he’s an asshole for the end part, but not for breaking it off.
She said she was from another country and she moved here years ago, that is why I asked. I understand, it’s completely fucked up, I was super stressed out at the time. I never would’ve involved ICE. If you look at my previous comment, I explained that I wanted to know if she had it just so I can say in case she tried taking me to court I’d tell her to take a DNA test (still fucked up, but this is where my mind was at the time).
I was very sorry after it, and her and I were cool for a bit until I just broke things off myself, for my self-respect and for hers. I also wanted to break up because I was scared about the baby thing and wanted to wait it out to see if she was actually pregnant or not (she kept holding me up for 2 months straight). It was my only way of knowing, I don’t have social media, and I didn’t have hers.
I’ve talked to two other coworkers here about the whole situation (both Latino) and they agree that she was a nutcase. They did not blame me for the way I reacted. (Still, not okay of course)
Everyone sucks here.
Removing a condom without consent during sex is sexual assault. You’re absolutely right to break off a relationship or go no-contact for this. In many jurisdictions, you could press criminal charges.
That’s not OK even if you’re very scared.
Your comment addressed everything I wanted to. You’re spot on.
He was definitely raped by her physically (condom removal) and mentally (sexually controlling, baby leverage).
He was wrong for asking about citizenship. That’s a fucked up level to go to for her actions, however vile. It’s pretty racist in my opinion because he wouldn’t ask that if she were White.
My verdict is he’s an asshole for the end part, but not for breaking it off.
She said she was from another country and she moved here years ago, that is why I asked. I understand, it’s completely fucked up, I was super stressed out at the time. I never would’ve involved ICE. If you look at my previous comment, I explained that I wanted to know if she had it just so I can say in case she tried taking me to court I’d tell her to take a DNA test (still fucked up, but this is where my mind was at the time).
I was very sorry after it, and her and I were cool for a bit until I just broke things off myself, for my self-respect and for hers. I also wanted to break up because I was scared about the baby thing and wanted to wait it out to see if she was actually pregnant or not (she kept holding me up for 2 months straight). It was my only way of knowing, I don’t have social media, and I didn’t have hers.
I’ve talked to two other coworkers here about the whole situation (both Latino) and they agree that she was a nutcase. They did not blame me for the way I reacted. (Still, not okay of course)
Removing a condom alone isn’t rape. From OPs story they didn’t continue having sex after she took it off without his permission, so there is no rape.
We did continue having sex. I was drunk when she took it off.
Was she drunk too? And you knew she took it off and chose to keep going?
She was not as drunk as I was. I was barely awake.
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