I’ve been a bad, bad little boy. I haven’t achieved any of the goals on my five-year plan. My gym membership has lapsed and I don’t think I’ve done any laundry in over three weeks.

What are you going to do about it? French maid’s outfit? Very kinky. And… degreaser? A sponge? Okay, what are we planning here? These are not the sexiest rubber gloves. Why are you pointing me towards the oven like that?