My only remaining ambition after age 40 was to be a worthwile human being at the very least (because that bar is very low) and I can’t even do that.
Some people are born broken, not necessarily through any fault of their own. But maybe I don’t even clear that barrier and am simply useless to anyone. Oh well.
No, it’s none of that. It’s that in my over four decades of life, I’ve never once lived up to my OWN potential, and despite trying my best, giving up, trying again, … countless times, I’ve still never managed to markedly improve my station in life, or my enjoyment of it.
I know I have everything I need to be capable, smart, confident person, but I’ve never BEEN any of those things, even fleetingly, so I can’t really even imagine how it would be like.
My only remaining ambition after age 40 was to be a worthwile human being at the very least (because that bar is very low) and I can’t even do that.
Some people are born broken, not necessarily through any fault of their own. But maybe I don’t even clear that barrier and am simply useless to anyone. Oh well.
Better than being a useful idiot for some evil fuck, even if true.
Which i doubt it is.
Plenty of people ‘living up to their potential’ shooting unarmed kids, signing death warrants for the unhoused, etc
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No, it’s none of that. It’s that in my over four decades of life, I’ve never once lived up to my OWN potential, and despite trying my best, giving up, trying again, … countless times, I’ve still never managed to markedly improve my station in life, or my enjoyment of it.
I know I have everything I need to be capable, smart, confident person, but I’ve never BEEN any of those things, even fleetingly, so I can’t really even imagine how it would be like.
Pathethic, I know.
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What does worthwhile even mean? Have you ever had any sort of positive interaction? Who’s to say that small moment of enjoyment wasn’t worthwhile?
Go find a someone who’s asking for help and help them.