• Daftydux@lemmy.dbzer0.comOP
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          1 day ago

          Megalomania

          Maybe the way I would say it is ‘extending compassion to the other as if it were yourself.’ Its like a rewriting of the golden rule.

          I do get what youre saying too.

          The topic probably does not go unexplored. Ill do some research.

          • ArseAssassin@sopuli.xyz
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            1 day ago

            Ah, you’re referring to the tendency of certain narcissistic people to treat others as an extension of themselves. That’s certainly not what I mean.

            The golden rule works for the most part, but it also needs to create the Other to work. What I’m thinking about is closer to the philosophy of Ubuntu, sometimes stated as “I am because we are”.

            Seems to me that someone who hates themselves is living with a tremendous shadow that completely cuts them off from unconditional love. Thus one lives in a constant state of war against themselves. I always enjoyed this clip of Alan Watts reading Carl Jung’s thoughts on the subject.

  • Canopyflyer@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Personally, I think Heinlein said it best: “Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.”

    Love is also a choice that you need to make every day.

    Next week my wife and I will be celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary. I love her more now than I did back then.

  • yesman@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Being in love makes you an expert on love the same way getting run over by a car makes you a mechanic.

  • tiredofsametab@fedia.io
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    2 days ago

    What is love? Baby don’t hurt me, dont hurt me, no more…

    (Would you please clarify the question as the song plays?)

  • gnomesaiyan@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Do you know what love is? A chemical. Electrons in your brain sending signals. Are you familiar with Ophiocordyceps unilateralis? It’s a fungus that infects ants. It’s amazing, really. The spores take over their central nervous systems and force them to climb to a high point, and then the fungus begins to grow up, bursting from the tops of their heads like a branch. And it kills them, of course. All so it can spray new spores over the jungle, infecting more ants. When people say love, that’s what I think of.

    • Daftydux@lemmy.dbzer0.comOP
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      2 days ago

      Ah the infinite loop.

      Some lyrics should help.

      Should I try to hide

      The way I feel inside

      My heart, for you?

      Would you say that you

      Would try to love me too?

      In your mind

      Could you ever be

      Really close to me?

      I can tell the way you smile

      If I feel that I

      Could be certain, then

      I would say the things

      I want to say tonight

      But 'til I can see

      That you’d really care for me

      I will dream

      That someday you’ll be

      Really close to me

      I can tell the way you smile

      If I feel that I

      Could be certain, then

      I would say the things

      I want to say tonight

      But 'til I can see

      That you’d really care for me

      I’ll keep trying to hide

      The way I feel inside

      Just recognize it and break the cycle.

  • palordrolap@fedia.io
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    2 days ago

    There are different forms of love. We’ve known this for millennia. There are also different kinds of understanding.

    It might be hard to express in words those feelings that otherwise come naturally, and conversely, it might be easy for a person to provide an excellent description of a certain form of love but be completely unable to feel or express it when a suitable situation arises.

    The most common one of these, I think, is those people who struggle to see certain others (variable as per preference) as anything other than potential sexual (or romantic) partners, despite likely being able to understand the dictionary definition of Platonic love.

    For my understanding of it, in the dictionary sense, at least, see above. For the other sense, I definitely understand some of them. Others I’m not sure.

  • lowspeedchase@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 days ago

    since feeling is first
    who pays any attention
    to the syntax of things
    will never wholly kiss you;

    wholly to be a fool
    while Spring is in the world

    my blood approves,
    and kisses are a better fate
    than wisdom
    lady i swear by all flowers. Don’t cry
    —the best gesture of my brain is less than
    your eyelids’ flutter which says

    we are for each other: then
    laugh, leaning back in my arms
    for life’s not a paragraph

    And death i think is no parenthesis

    – ee cummings

  • Battle_Masker@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    2 days ago

    Nope. Tho that might be years of others conditioning me to believe I was unlovable, then social doings became harder cause I was done with school

    • Daftydux@lemmy.dbzer0.comOP
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      2 days ago

      Found one.

      There are plenty of people who felt the same way you do but it doesnt have to be a macro thing. Am I lovable? What a crazy thing to say. Have I been loved? I love you. I dont love anything specific about you, obviously, but when I look out into the world I want you to be safe, and cared for, and healthy. Thats love.

      Thats macro. Micro comes from within. Its wired into your body, generally speaking.